Thursday, April 30, 2015

From Tears to Laughter :)

Some times my thoughts and feelings are dark and scary and writing is the only way I can put them out there honestly.  I have that sort of personality that makes me smile when I am with people.   Generally, I am truly happy and sometimes, rarely, I do it and hide my true feelings of the moment.   But the main thing is feelings are fleeting.   Often they are in the moment and then gone and the next feeling comes along.    We can make feelings continue by replaying the story in our heads but if left to their own devices they usually move along leaving room for another feeling to fill the void.

Yesterday was an especially difficult day but with the help of a wonderful daughter, a gorgeous granddaughter and friends that understand me, I made it through barely scathed and was able to start again today.   Now today was a little slow at getting to be better.......but sometimes the God of surprises has a very interesting way of waking up the funny side of life.   God can have the dark and ominous humour that I am familiar with and other times God allows the silly side of life to make you lighten up.

I decided to take a shower.   Not necessarily a fun idea with all that is now involved and so the decision to do this often takes awhile to percolate in my mind and then find its way into the body to get me moving.     So, off I trudge to the basement, down 17 stairs with my cane, organize everything with in reach, the towels, soap, shampoo and of course the lift for my leg.    Of course my menagerie of animals must also follow me into the bathroom.  So I am dodging and stepping, yelling "move" and "get out" as I arrange my stuff.

Then sitting down, taking the brace off, lifting the leg into the tub and closing the curtain.....or I must say attempting to close the curtain.    The reason for this is that I have a cat that is walking behind me on my shower chair and then along the tub and a dog who is pushing her head into the shower and knocking everything over.  Squidjet is just watching all this from a distance!  So, first I start to get frustrated and then decide to just spray them all.   Well, they loved it.   They thought this was a great game and Maize (the dog) kept coming back and sticking her nose in and trying to catch the water out of the wand, and Curia was batting the spray and Maize's nose having a grand time.    Well, then I could feel this laughter just start to gurgle up from deep within me and I too began to enjoy the fun.     Needless to say we were all soaked by the end, shower taken, hair washed and didn't even mind the extra effort involved.    An aside, I had to be really careful getting out and dressed because there was quite a mess on the outside of the shower too.   I know, I know, I have to be careful!   Lighten up and enjoy the visual!!!!!   

Curia (the cat) and Maize (the dog) BFF's

So I have gone from tears to laughter in the last 24 hours.    How amazing is that!    I guess living in the moment means the good and the bad, just as long as you recognize the good as much as you do the bad.    Imagine if I had decided that taking a shower was just too much work I would have missed all the laughter.    Many people thought Maize would be too much for me after surgery, including myself.   There were times when I thought "what was I thinking getting such a big dog".   Even thought I would have to give her up.   Well, she has been a blessing in my life during this time for many reasons, and one of them is the silliness a puppy brings into a household.    As I write this she is curled up on the day bed fast asleep from all the fun we had a little while ago.    The cats well they have tried to kill me many times going down the stairs but that cane has found its place enough that now they just 'get out of the way'.   So we have all found our space in this little apartment and today we all had a little bit of silly fun.

So God has taken me from the despair of yesterday to the hope of today.....for that I am truly thankful.    God has also shown me that the ups and downs of life have always been there just at this time they are more obvious.   Hopefully I will remember that the next time I am feeling blue.

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