Waiting for surgery ... Still

So what to write?   Nothing good at this point.    Still seeing doctors and doing tests....seems like an endless task and sometimes a waste of precious time.    Then the rational part takes over and I know that a few weeks or a couple of months in the life of cancer is not a long time ...unless you are in the eleventh hour.   Which I am not !!!!!

So, at this point it looks like major surgery is called for ......nothing minor ever seems to be my way.   Saw the ortho surgeon after much phone calls and drumming of fingers ( read smacking of fists) .   I was at the point of thinking we should fine someone else but my oncologist didn't agree.   His analogy (of which he has many) was that if you wanted good food you went to the place where all people go!    I even took the liberty of phoning myself , leaving a message as they never seem to answer.   Polite but detailed.    Don't know if it worked but had an appt four days later .   Must admit though I do like him ......very easy to talk to and explains thing well and in a way that you feel part of the team.   That is important to me as I want to be "in the loop" . So we do more tests!

 Seems that the cancer has gone into the bone and quite a bit of the bone.    Not common of course!   He believes he can remove the affected bone and rebuild it  so my pants don't fall down ....his words not mine :)     Seems bones have very practical purposes , as well as essential ones.    Long and very painful surgery and that is just his part.  Then here's the other half of the surgery that my oncologist will perform ..... It will be very long and painful according to them both!     Oh goody !

So, what does one do in the meantime......that is the part I am trying to figure out......not feeling very good, and also a bit scared.     Honestly, at this point I am numb ...... Need more time for it to process and sink in......it's shitty cause one of the tests is a bone scan to make sure it has not gone anywhere else.   Thinking if it has not much point in doing the surgery ....at least the hip part..... Like closing the barn door once the horse is gone .

So we wait, and pray!