Why me?

Today is a day I remember...about the past but also in the present.   December 6 will always be different.  Five years ago today my father died.   It makes me realize that when we say "we are all equal"  it has a much deeper meaning than what the world often thinks.   We are equal, not at a material level, but at the level of existence and suffering.   These are the times when we touch the souls of each other and are reminded that we have so much more in common than not.  We are corruptable beings whose bodies will let us down and eventually will cease to be able to maintain the necessary energy to keep us moving in this vessel.    But we are also equal at the level of understanding pain, disappointment, struggle, fear, anger and all the intangibles that make us who we are a beings.  So the question "why me?"   really does become "why not me?"

The past few days have been very humbling ones for me.   Although, I know that I have my own issues I have been reminded that I am not alone in that area.   It is not the suffering that separates us but the unique ways we choose to deal with it.   As Budda tells us "life is suffering"  the impermanence of life physically, but also emotionally and mentally is what causes suffering in our lives.  Each of us carries some form of 'cross' (notice I use multi-religious metaphors) but we each decide how we shall live that out. We can not always control how our lives evolve but the attitude we take to our life is very much within our control.  Over the past few days, I have been privilaged to meet people who are amazing in their outlook, their stamina, and their resilence even though they have every reason to be bitter, angry, and disparing.   It has been a good reminder to realize that although I may have to go through things in my life that I don't want to....or have no control over...I truly am in control of how I live it out.   This isn't a new revelation by any means, but what I have realized is that I am not alone.   The only ones in our world who are truly alone are those who believe that they have no suffering....the denial people.   Those people who refuse to accept the fact that we are all equal in our difficuties....and when we share them with each other we can be a true community if we accept our own suffering and  live out the experiences it offers.   Notice I didn't use the word 'blessings'   Still not blessings just experiences...its makes a difference to me!!!!!

So, I have renamed the bus  the 'experience bus' so that we can all drive together and find the experiences life offers us during this journey.   Periodically, I will refer to the bus as 'denial' on those days when I am not feeling so enlightened and generous(after all I am still only human)....but for today we are off to have an experience.....maybe we will jump a cliff or two on the way.....hold on...